Last night was my first night of meditation. It was simple, I focused on my breathing. I breath in, I breath out. Twenty minutes after I started I stopped, even though the meditation was suppose to be 40 minutes according to the thing on my iPod.

I felt...tired and was ready to sleep. It didn't help that it was two in the morning either. So I went to bed. During that time just before you fall asleep but you are still grounded in reality I started to have very clear images in my mind. Violent animals swept across my mind's eye, lions, wolves, bears and....ummmm.....horses. The horses were scary though, up in my face and what not.

I've never had something like this happen to me before. It was interesting to say the least but very unexpected. I wonder if any other nifty things will happen when I meditate tonight.

Now, for something completely different.

This weekend I was walking to work and a large button fell off my coat. It is winter right now and cold but instead of putting the button back on my coat I looked at it. I mean really looked at it. Then I thought, "If we are all interconnected then I hold the universe in my hand".

It was my little realization for the day.

As a reminder of interconnectedness to all things I'm going to make a simple necklace out of the button and wear it always. Again, just as a reminder.

Stay mindful,

Brian

In order for something to be reborn something needs to die.

This is something I heard when I was listening to talks about Zen. Last night while meditating this was the only phrase that was going through my head.

In order for something to be reborn something needs to die.

I've been thinking about change, that I need to change things to get the life that I want. Maybe I shouldn't be worried about obtaining the life I want. Maybe I do not need to change. Maybe I need to have a re-birth, not in a literal sense but in a metaphorical sense.

In order for something to be reborn something needs to die.

My old way of life has to die, that way I can achieve the list of things that I wrote out earlier today. It's not different then previous lists that I've written in the past, but it is different. I'm not looking at it as something that is bad but a guide of the things that my new mind will accomplish.

It's going to take a year, 365 single days, to complete this list. Nothing else will be place on the list. It's simple, something that I wouldn't be able to complete but after tonight this will be a cake walk.

In order for something to be reborn something needs to die.

The List

1. Write two full length horror screenplays
2. Weigh 160 lbs
3. Go bungee jumping
4. Graduate college
5. Master the ashtanga yoga primary series
6. Get a tattoo
7. Deepen my Zen Buddhism practise
8. Re-invent my personality
9. Learn time management
10. Complete the Tools To Life program